As a part of the Presidential Scholars Program at FIT, I am required to attend monthly meetings that are called ‘Colloquiums’. These take place Wednesday evenings from about 6:00-8:30pm. Usually we get dinner catered to us from the people who the run the cafeteria and we discuss news, opportunities and upcoming events for the honors program. The food isnt really that great, but the cookies are famous and the company is some of the best I have ever had. I have Asian Literature until 6pm on Wednesdays so I usually go straight to the meeting hoping for dinner, but the past few events have been dessert only so I have opted for a big lunch and a dinner of several cookies. Tonight’s Colloquium was in conjunction with the Spring semester’s Dean’s Forum and featured National Geographic Photographer Annie Griffiths Belt. After a brief introduction to her career in photography, Annie led us a through a stunning selection of her work from the past 30 years accompanied by her side stories. I was completely moved and once more, so thankful for my involvement in the honors program since it continually gives me balance and perspective on the world. After this meeting I briefly fell in love with the idea of saying, “Screw it all! I am going to Nebraska to photograph farmers and then off to Namibia to pantomime with the natives!” and then of course I realized I didnt have a grant from National Geographic….plus I am not a talented young photographer AND I would probably be incredibly stressed out. Even still, it was lovely to escape for 2 hours into the world of photographic journalism. I immediately texted my friend, Olivia, who studies Wildlife Conservation in Maine and is extremely dedicated to her hobby of photography.

In other news, on Tuesday, Cannon let me go three different showrooms and pull items for a spread in Oprah’s magazine featuring the Beauty Editors and themed around the inspiration of Old Hollywood/1930’s/Glamour/Aviator/Amelia Earhart. I am beyond excited that I had the opportunity to actually act as a mini stylist and pick a few apparel items, hats, gloves and jewelry that might actually appear in print!! Of course my choices were centered around some specific images and constraints, but nevertheless I had some empowerment as an intern for sure! Tomorrow my e-commerce class isnt meeting so I will have time to stop by the photoshoot and see how its going as well as running down to Soho to visit Anthropologie to fulfill an assignment. I must be off to study for several quizzes tomorrow as well as finish my tea. Its Lemon Rose and was handmade by my homestay mother when I went to Japan in 10th grade!!! Luckily sealed tea doesnt go bad!! <3

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Tonight I did the community service activity for the I Love New York Club. Four of us went to babysit while the moms got to do craft night. It was basically everything I was expecting. It was such a good experience and sure enough it ended with me bouncing an adorable black baby named Miasia on my lap. Fox House Women’s Shelter is located on 117th between Park and Lexington which isnt necessarily the nicest neighborhood in Manhattan, but everyone was super nice. I was surprised because I knew there would be kids (obviously…) but I wasnt expecting there to be SO many babies and SO many expecting moms! Pretty much everyone was pregnant, in labor or had just given birth. It was crazy! and some of these ladies were YOUNG, I am not sure how young because I wasnt sitting there quizzing them on their life stories, but it was just really crazy to realize these young women are single mothers AND homeless on top of everything. Everyone was wearing old sweats and the craft of the night was bedazzling baseball hats with crystal letters. So sweet to see these ladies bedazzle a hat with three letters on it: Mom. Miasia’s mother was really nice about my inexperience with babies. She showed me how she feeds and burps Miasia and let me hold her for pretty much the whole time. I am fairly confident I do have a maternal instinct that hasnt fully surfaced in me yet. Norma once pointed out that she always thought of me as maternal when it comes to my friends, which I would agree with because I do want the best for everyone. I am still really confident in my early decision to avoid pregnancy and alt for adoption. I know the adoption process is expensive, challenging and difficult, but I think the result is so resoundingly important. My motto: there are enough babies in the world. Or even better, if there were a way for me to help young mothers like tonight, I would LOVE that because I could contribute to several people’s lives as opposed to just focusing on my needs. I cant get over this nasty feeling that having children is incredibly selfish. Anyways those are just some thoughts for tonight. Katie and I talked about babies and kids for a bit on the subway ride back and its interesting to hear my peers getting closer to that life stage of wanting to settle down and be married and have kids. I feel SO far from that. I cannot even picture myself committing to anything bigger then an apartment.

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Instead of trying to catch this up on every god damn thing I have done since the last post I will just highlight some of the top events:

I had the second person in my lifetime guess my racial identity today. It was super shocking and I think I made it into a way bigger deal then I needed to, but that is something extremely interesting and significant to me. Apparently post surgery, my ethnic make up has become more and more defined to the point where complete strangers are asking if I am Half Japanese!! WOW! Speaking of my surgery, I still have some uncomfortable feelings in my jaw. Not pain exactly, but it definitely feels unstable which makes me nervous. I can see how much my lower jaw has receded since the actual surgery, which I know is totally normal but it is sort of scary to think that my bones could give way at any moment and deteriorate on me. I sort of wonder if my multitude plagues are all possibly related to something…. ah well I am not going to give up my life to be a test subject so nevermind.

I went to the gym yesterday and this morning and have been really staying on top of my eating right and I think its really paying off. I feel extremely comfortable in my own skin right now. Obviously there is always room for improvement: I would like to consume less caffiene and cook more veggie dishes, but for my present lifestyle, I think I am doing rather well.

Tomorrow night I am volunteering with the I Love New York Club at a womens shelter craft night. We are babysitting the kids while the women get to do something fun and distracting. Knowing my track record with kids, I am apprehensive, but also really excited to participate in something meaningful that isn’t required by me. This is what I want my life to be like: pushing forward towards improvement, making money, learning, having a good time, being active, and being happy.

I have a major new girl crush on Carey Mulligan. I think she is so beautiful and I love her new blonde pixie and her Vionnet dresses and of COURSE, I am a fan of her boyfriend too.

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I was at my stylists studio today taking a snapshot of a polo that he needed to see. I had just finished locking up and was waiting for the elevators when I heard a bang. I looked to my left and there was the most attractive boy, blonde with perfectly dishelved hair, a bit taller then me and wearing a button up and some jeans. It was like he just materialized out of thin air (the bang indicates to me that he had just come out of the bathroom and let the door slam shut behind him hahaha) and he gives me this shy little look and then disappears into the studio behind me. He left the door partially opened and sort of lingered there but then the elevator came and I got in with the smallest smile on my face and an even bigger one in my head. I dont care if there wasnt anything said out loud. I still appreciate it.

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I finished my first week of the Spring 2010 semester and I definitely survived! Its going to be absolute madness for sure around here. Monday and Tuesday were equally amazing. I am interning with a stylist and my first days were on the set of a photoshoot. The photoshoot was for a lookbook and advertising campaign for an italian brand. I am not going to go into the details since thats not exactly appropriate intern behavior, but it was sooooo much fun and I learned sooooo much. One of the models was from Seattle and was super sweet. She was only 15 and did such a good job on her 6 looks for the advertising campaign. I got to help with steaming, organizing, and dressing the models. it was really funny because they put these awesome exaggerated fake nails on both of the girls so they couldnt even get their pants off. It was sort of hilarious pulling pants off these size 0 teenage models. There were some amazing accessories that the stylist picked up. All of these fun candy colored sungalsses from St. Marks and we borrowed his friends collection of Christian Louboutins. Everyone on set was Italian and kept shouting things like, “Brava!” and “Che!” and “Bellissima!”. it was kind of hilarious because it was so expected. Monday, we mainly just prepped for the actual photoshoot which took place on Tuesday. The studio was being used that day by another type of photoshoot, involving lots of “voluptuous” scantily clad women. One of the models was wearing a cheap blonde wig and a bikni made out of playing cards hahahah. I cant even make this shit up. There was a lot of cellulite and too much make up. Basically I can tell that I am going to love this internship. It was exhausting since I was running all over the city looking for roller skates or picking up rental flamingos but I am definitely going to be learning a crazy amount of shit.

My classes this semester seem really interesting. A couple of them are back to back which is going to make things a bit difficult in terms of timing and eating, but its just the next step in my continual push for my schedule. I have a shit ton of reading to do for Asian Literature, but its an honors class, which basically means I dont really need to worry about the actual grade; I am more concerned with trying to get the most of it. There this pretentious asshole who works in the writing studio in my class and a slew of socially stunted nerds who are obsessed with anything Asian (this ALWAYS happens in any class related to Asia…..) but the teacher is really cool and I already like the sort of philosophical discussions we have been generating. It will probably be my favorite class. I definitely have a lot of work for my other classes too, but I think its doable. I am feeling overwhelmed but I think only because its the first week.

I am back to working my ass off at Victoria’s Secret. Gotta make that extra spending money so I can afford to enjoy NYC!!! My roommate is super sweet but we dont really talk all the much. She came in around 1:30am this morning and woke me up slamming around the room, and then Carlene called me at 4am this morning to tell me that she just assaulted some guy for making a racial slur at her and he was threatening to call the cops. Good freaking lord. It was an unrestful night for sure. We are in the midst of a snow storm as well so I am sure it will be dead at work today.

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I was re-reading some of my older entries on livejournal and they are so funny and about nothing, but also very telling about how my life was back then. I really want to make an effort with that. maybe I will just post random little thoughts and blurbs that are too personal for tumblr, but too long for twitter. hahaha. there are too many social networking devices out there now. Oh well. I am downloading a whole bunch of music right now while simultaneously posting videos from youtube on my tumblr. they are mainly songs from my high school playlist that I still love to death, hence why I started going through my older posts on livejournal. I wish I still had all my playlists from middle school. I have a distinct memory of me listening to Nirvana on a school bus for that Teen Arts Summer Camp at the Seattle center. I was sitting on the afternoon sunny side and watching my current crush of the moment, a H.R. he played bass or guitar or something in a band and had mastered the art of boyish dressing and floppy golden hair. In fact, I am going to go see if i can find him on facebook right now….

okay….so I cant find him hahah. He never did seem like the type to be part of that shit. Come to think of it, Kyle (hot Fred Meyer boy) is un-findable on facebook as well. Maybe I am just attracted to the type that doesnt want to be on facebook.

Tomorrow, Riley and Brett come back and I am ecstatic!!! We are going to go out to lunch and then have a grammy party with charlie and whomever! I am back to work and everything seems the same as before. blech.

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In the past two days I have come to a massive conclusion about myself. Well I guess it really isnt that crazy, but in my current situation in life its something big and very relevant. After spending an entire winter break farrrrr too emotionally involved in my friends problems, I realized that I am very similar to Cher (Clueless) or Emma. I get so worked up in my friends lives, and I really just need to focus on myself. This thought expanded to the realization that I am really really judgmental on my friends.I have always been a judgmental person and in the past i have gotten some major shit from times when my intentions were misunderstood. I really dont want that happening anymore. The important concept to take away from this discovery is this: what is right for me is not necessarily right for my friends. I have always only wanted what is best for my friends and i have become overwhelmingly frustrated when they arent doing exactly what I want, which is the stupidest thing ever because obviously everyone needs to figure these things out for themselves. I see and hear about them hurting themselves and I automatically form these giant proclamations on how to solve their problems and fix their lives, but for the most part these issues will work themselves out and prove to be positive learning experiences. Furthermore I am going to tone it down a bit so as not to cause unnecessary problems. I have always been a very opinionated and vocal person, but I dont think its always that helpful, especially if my friends dont want to hear about it… or maybe its more they dont need to hear about it. Everyone needs to figure out life for themselves and there are different paths to take.

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1. Nordstrom
Being from Seattle, I was born and raised a Nordstrom girl. They have always held the bar for a satisfactory shopping experience for me. They have quality service without being scary and overbearing. The merchandise is quality, stylish, and extremely versatile. I am just now graduating into TBD and lusting over everything in the Savvy department. I love the concept of never being able to outgrow a store. Every time I set foot in that store I fall in love with something new and when I do buy something (which is frequently) I rarely have shoppers remorse. I am an extreme sucker for the shoe department since its usually the first thing I see when walking into the flaghip downtown. The one thing Manhattan lacks is Nordstrom.

2. Urban Outfitters
If I could have an entire wardrobe from any store it would be Urban Outfitters. I like that it embodies a lifestyle and is really selling an attitude. Their clothing is youthful, trendy, sexy and you can usually find something very unique. Their price points are amazing and their sale rack is a stellar place to score. Their website is the best place to shop online because it always has amazing photography of the merchandise and also allows user reviews of individual merchandise (which is actually extremely helpful when determining fit or sizing). Its also an amazing place to buy gifts for hard to shop people.

3. H&M
Keep in mind that up until a few years ago there was no H&M on the west coast. I was addicted the moment I set foot into the 5th ave location on my first trip to New York City. You can find amazing knock offs and fashion forward pieces that other stores are not willing to risk selling. During that trip I ended up buying a black shiny stretch full length unitard. You definitely wont find that at Macy’s. Most of my work clothes come from H&M since I want to look put together but cant afford to buy everything at investment prices. I have an amazing black blazer and black sheath dress from H&M that are timeless and look leagues more expensive then they actually were.

4. American Apparel
I remember back in the day when American Apparel operated strictly as wholesale out of a catalog. My mother used to order samples for my sister when she was in middle school. Well times have changed, and now everyone is wearing something from American Apparel. It was refreshing to have clothing that was consistent, predictable, easy to wear and practical. Pretty much anyone can find something in American Apparel that suits their needs. I am a very casual person too so its a great place for hoodies, leggings and their famed deep v-neck tee shirts, but they have also expanded their collection to include some incredibly sexy dresses, leotards, and intimate apparel. I am also a fan of the provocative advertising campaigns that feature some actually interesting looking models.

5. UNIQLO
The UNIQLO flagship is in Soho and was introduced to me as the “Japanese version of the GAP.” Obviously I was intrigued and not disappointed. UNIQLO delivers quality basics with a stylish twist at awesome value. I got some great boyfriend jeans and a cropped gray cashmere tee for really cheap. I can also count on them for affordable prices on things like cardigans, tanks and when I was looking for over the knee black socks they were the first and only store I hit up. I like that there isn’t a contrived image behind the clothing and anyone with a sense of style can take their merchandise and do something different with it. It’s also relatively new to the states, so not everyone is wearing/raving about it outside NYC.

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Alrighty! So I just finished the new layout yesterday. The CSS could definitely stand to be more creative, but overall I am really pleased with it. I have found that I am often very attracted to the purity of a white background. It features Taylor Momsen, from Gossip Girl. I saw her band, Pretty Reckless, open for the Veronicas this summer and was floored with how GOOD she is. Her voals are really impressive and I did not expect her to be so edgy. It also helps that she is stunning, has legs for days, and dresses like a modern day courtney love turned fashionista. Anyways I just wrote a tutorial on bleaching hair. You can find it here.

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Good jesus lord I have had a lot of downtime this winter break. Its nice and all to relax and not worry about anything, but at the same time I feel sooo unproductive and I also feel like I am just hemorrhaging money. I also have ten million ideas of what to do with this site, but very little focus and motivation. Part of me wants to start including product reviews since I thoroughly enjoy reading them, but they also require intensive work to look nice. By intensive work I mean lots and lots of photos that are uploaded and edited nicely. I might try and do it at some point here and there just to get into the swing of things. I started a new layout, its very different from this one and its going to be pretty tricky to code, but I am hoping to get it up by tomorrow.

I have been keeping my social calendar filled though. Sunday I did a photoshoot with Bebe, a really sweet girl from my high school who is pursuing a degree in graphic design. Naturally she has an interest in photography too and she asked me via facebook if i would be interested in modeling. I was flattered that she would ask me and really excited because I love photoshoots! I invited Riley along so that Bebe could get 2 models in one shoot and I suggested using Discovery Park as our setting. Here is one of the shots of me (foreground) and Riley (background). Bebe is amazing with photoshop. Click the photo to get to her flickr to see the rest of the shoot!!

During the photoshoot I managed to lose my cell phone (i am such a dumb ass) but seeing as how I was eligible for an upgrade and planning on getting a new phone this break, losing my phone sort of expedited the process. I ended up getting the G1 which my mother and Carlene has. Its actually a lot nicer then I was expecting and I LOVE having internet, twitter and facebook with me wherever I go. I am still trying to get the email worked out. I have three email accounts and my school email is totally fucked up and doesnt like to cooperate with things like Outlook and my cellphone. Very very annoying because I would like to be able to send emails using my school email since I use that for my internships, job applications, etc. I may just start using my new gmail account for those sorts of emails.

Anyways I will hopefully get that layout up by tomorrow. wish me luck lovers!

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